My Immortal
by enigma's soul
Summary: What if everything you read in your favourite book were real? This is my story. This is my fantasy. This is my Twilight. And this Edward is mine! AU Note: Please be aware this story has no Bella. Rated M (Just in case).
1. Chapter 1

**Hi, everyone. Welcome to my first fanfic. I have read numerous stories that are wonderful on here, so I decided to publish my own. I hope you will enjoy the journey as much as I hope to enjoy taking you there. Unfortunately, my story doesn't include Bella, so if you no longer wish to read on, I completely understand. I will write my disclaimer here, and no farther. Please enjoy and please leave your reviews!**

**I do not own Twilight, or anything affiliated with the great Stephenie Meyer.**

I had always loved my fantasies when I was a little girl, and like most kids, I would role play. Whether I was a princess for the day, dressing up in my costumes and making my castle from boxes, where I would reign over my kingdom that was the sitting room. Or a mermaid, splashing around in the bathtub with my legs together pretending it was my tail, diving down deep into my own underwater world. My mom would always scold me for soaking the bathroom completely with my splashing, but she would always smile at me when she was drying me off. Or wanting to be like my mom, and dressing in her clothes and almost breaking my ankles wearing her high heels. Once I was a little older, I would still fantasize about being a princess and dream that my knight in shining armour would protect me from the evil forces of the world. My knight would ride in valiantly on his steed - which, of course, would be played by the family dog - and he would rid my life of the wicked queen - which would be played by the family cat. I would dream of being a nurse, using my dolls and teddies as patients, wrapping them up in bandages and feeding them my pretend chicken soup.

A little older still, and I would start to play out my favourite TV shows with my friends, pretending to be rich and successful lawyers or socialites. Dallas was always a favourite, pretending to be the owner of a huge oil company, and being obscenely wealthy. I would dream that I had found Mr. Right, but he was poor and my family didn't approve. I would pretend that we broke all barriers for our love and would end up with our happy ever after. Then there were the fantasies of my early teenage years, that would see me being the girlfriend of my favourite pop star or film star. Of course, I wouldn't act those ones out, but they were always acted out in my head. The details in my head would be perfect, from the tiny ones where I would imagine what type of earrings I was wearing, to what my first meeting with the person would be. What he would be wearing, what he would say to me, and what my future with him would turn into. Always, we would be desperately in love and nothing would be in our way of happiness. Needless to say, I was always being rebuked by my school teachers for daydreaming in class, and my parents would worry when my attention span didn't last more than two minutes. I was, however, very good at creative writing, as my imagination would run wild, and I could turn my fantasies into stories that would last the test of time. For me, at least.

When I hit sixteen years of age, I met a boy called Jasper, and we fell in love. We were good together, and happy, but I would still have my daydreams and fantasies in my head, which he found adorable. Most of the time, my dreams included him, but others would be complete fantasy with film stars, or someone I had completely made up on my own. He would stare at me while my mind was elsewhere, and he would snicker at my facial expressions, as my dreams played through in my head. He knew they were just silly fantasies, and I apologised to him numerous times, but he would always tell me to stop saying sorry as he knew they weren't real, and everyone was entitled to dreams that would never come true. He told me if no one had their dreams to take their mind away from reality a little, we would probably all be insane by now.

We had a son when I turned twenty, who we called Charlie, and he was the double of his father. He was also like me a great deal as, when he grew, I would notice him day dreaming like I did. We made a lovely little family, and we were happy. Of course, we had our ups and downs as most couples do, but for the most part, we were good. Sadly, it didn't last, as I lost my partner, and my son lost his father, when he died suddenly at the age of twenty seven. It was hard, and my son always seemed to blame himself for his fathers death. He would always mumble that he should have protected him, that there should have been something that he could of done. It was hard to explain to him that there was nothing he could have done, but he was only seven at the time, and couldn't grasp the fact that things like this happened for no reason. I found my son day dreamed all the more after that, and I could just imagine that he was living his dreams in his head, with his father by his side. My day dreaming stopped for a long time. I felt I had no right to my fantasies, when there were others who could no longer dream at all, like Jasper. He could no longer dream or sleep or love, and I felt that I shouldn't be allowed to dream either. I felt it unfair and felt I was betraying him if I did.

Eventually, as Charlie grew older, he stopped blaming himself for Jasper's death, and his mind settled a little, meaning his day dreaming became less and less. My mind started playing around with little dreams again, but nothing spectacular the way I used to, not even when a friend told me of a new series of books that had been released. I used to love reading, as they would fuel my fantasies and give me different situations that I could dream about. I hadn't lifted a book since Jasper, and although my friend said they were fantastic, I had no intentions of reading them. She told me what they were about, and although I liked mythical fantasies, I just wasn't interested in reading them. I thought I was a little old for that kind of thing now, being thirty and all. My friend then informed me that the books were to be adapted for film, and she gushed over them like a giddy teenager. When she saw the first film, she told me the plot and said it was wonderful, and she couldn't wait for the next instalment. I had read in the papers about the film being a phenomenon, but for some reason, it still didn't appeal to me. Not until 2010, two years after it's first release, that is.

_Thank God that shift is over,_ I thought as I packed away my equipment. I worked in a beauty salon, doing everything from pedicures and manicures, to spray tans, makeup and of course …. waxing. That was my favourite. Not that I was sadistic in any way, but after the shock of the treatment and me using the soothing gel on my clients, they looked at me as if I was their guardian angel, sent to deliver them from the clutches of the evil wax monster. It made me feel good to see the relief on their faces. I chuckled to myself as I packed up the last of my things.

"You coming to the club tonight, Laura?" asked Suzie, one of my colleagues.

"Not tonight," I replied. "It's been a busy week and I just want to start off the weekend relaxing at home."

"Seriously?" she asked, raising her perfectly threaded eyebrows at me.

I chuckled lightly. "Yeah. Seriously. My feet are aching, so I'm going to have a long, hot, relaxing bath, get into my pyjamas and see what's on the box."

"Aww, man!" she mumbled.

"Next week, I promise," I told her, giving her a hug. "Goodnight girls, see you next week," I said, as I headed out the door to the parking lot.

After Jasper died, my boss offered to renew my contract, making sure I would only work Monday through Friday. That way, I wouldn't have to pay for childcare at the weekends, and I could work while Charlie was at school. I was so grateful to her, and she said she would have done it for any of her girls. My mom looked after Charlie when he was on breaks from school, so I didn't need to pay for extra childcare then, either. That meant I could save extra money that I wouldn't have had otherwise. I had amassed a decent sized nest egg over the years, which I knew Charlie and I would need at some point if anything, God forbid, were to happen to my mother. Charlie and I had moved in with my parents about six months after Jasper died. My father had a severe stroke, and my mother needed the extra help that I could provide after work. Dad passed about a year after that, but I decided to stay with mom. She was devastated, of course, but Charlie helped to keep her grounded, and I couldn't bare to leave her on her own.

Opening my front door, I called out to mom I was home.

"Hi, honey," she said, as I kicked of my shoes and flopped onto the sofa. "Good day?" she asked with a grin.

"Yeah," I sighed, as I relaxed into the soft cushions. "Busy."

"Hungry?" she asked, getting up from her chair.

"No thanks, mom. I'll eat after my bath. Where's Charlie?"

"Staying over at his friends for the weekend."

"Oh, okay."

Charlie was sixteen now, and was becoming quite the independent young man. He didn't like to stay over at his friends at weekends, because he liked to spend my days off with mom and I, but apparently his friend had just got some new games for his X-box, and they were going to have a marathon session. I was going to have to talk to him about staying over more. He had his own life now, and he could always see me in the evenings. I wanted him to know there was no need for him to stay home every weekend, but knowing him, his answer would be : "I just want to make sure you are both okay." I smiled to myself as I ran my bath and poured loads of bath oil into the running water. I lit some candles around the tub, and went through into the kitchen for a glass of wine. Stopping off at my bedroom for my pyjamas, I called out to mom that I was going for my bath.

"Okay. I'm going to bed Laura. I bought a new book today, and I just want to snuggle up with it," she called back.

"Fine, mom. I'll see you in the morning."

I tentatively lowered myself into the scalding bath water. Once my body had become accustomed to the heat, I began to relax, sipping my wine. This was more or less the only time I would daydream now, while relaxing in the bath. I lay down with my head propped on an inflatable pillow, and closed my eyes. I imagined Charlie meeting the woman of his dreams and falling madly in love. I imagined their wedding day and my future grandkids. There were two. A boy and a girl. Twins, I imagined, with Charlie's beautiful, thick black hair and his stunning hazel eyes. Their names would be …. hmm, let me see … Carlisle and Alice. Jasper and I had talked about having more kids, and we had picked out those names if we did have more. So, of course, I would imagine my grandkids with those very names.

I sighed as the water began to cool, and reluctantly got out. I dried and dressed in the bathroom, leaving my hair wrapped in a towel, as I headed back into the sitting room. I looked through the TV listings for the evening, and found absolutely nothing of interest. One movie did stand out to me though. I remembered back a few years to my friend gushing over it.

"Twilight," I mumbled, rolling my eyes. It was being premiered for the first time on a local channel. It still didn't really appeal to me, but I had to watch something, just so as I could fully unwind before heading to bed. Shrugging my shoulders, I went to the kitchen for another glass of wine and some chips, and then settled down curling my legs beneath me, and watched the opening sequence. Sipping my wine, I snorted slightly. _Vampires,_ I thought, rolling my eyes again. I eventually settled down enough to watch the full movie, and by the time the end credits were rolling, I gasped.

"Jesus."


	2. Chapter 2

"Jesus," I whispered, after watching the movie. I was still sitting staring at the TV screen, even though another programme had started. My mind was reeling, and I actually found my heart rate had picked up a little. I took a deep breath, and shivered as a cool tingle ran up my spine.

"So many coincidences," I whispered to myself, and another shiver ran through me. I shook my head, trying to regain some sort of equilibrium, before my mother would come through and catch me gaping at the TV like a complete idiot. She would think I was mad if she saw me, so with another shake of my head, I stood and switched the TV off.

I made my way upstairs to bed, and by the time I closed my bedroom door, I was berating myself.

"Get a grip, Laura. It's just a movie," I said to myself. "And coincidences happen every day. Probably half the population are telling themselves the same thing, right now"

I moaned, and thought to myself, _God, now I'm talking to myself! Nice one, Laura._

I was pretty pissed with myself now, and I slammed the light off and jumped into bed, punching the pillows into a more comfortable state. I tried to close my eyes, but they refused, so I was laying in the dark staring at the ceiling, with my brain working over time with the movie replaying through it. I couldn't get away from the names of the characters. Jasper, Charlie, Carlisle and Alice. Bella also. I had an aunt Isabella, who we all called Bella, too. My next door neighbours' son was called Edward, although he wasn't as cute as the guy that played vampire Edward. I had an aunt Rose, although she wasn't Rosalie, but Rose_mary_, but it was close enough. The only names I didn't relate to were, Emmett, Esme and Renee. I didn't know anyone with those names, but hey, the rest were damn well close enough to start my mind wandering. The Cullen's also lived in a house surrounded by forest with a river at the bottom of their garden. I didn't have a house like that, but it had always been a dream of mine to own a property like that. That's what I was saving so intensely for. My dream home, surrounded by acres and acres of trees. I had always loved nature, and knew I would love to live amongst it. And Clair de Lune. My God. It was the third movement from the Suite Bergamasque by Claude Debussy, and it was my absolute favourite piece. My mind began to drift dangerously close to believing the movie had been real.

"Ridiculous," I hissed at myself, and threw myself onto my side with enough force to bounce, and tried to sleep before I could convince myself they _were_ real. I mean, the names didn't even match up with my relatives. Charlie was the dad in the movie, not a son. Carlisle and Alice were non existent in my life, but I had always dreamed they would be. Bella was my aunt, not a teenager, and Edward was a neighbour. Jasper no longer walked this earth with me, and in the movie, he was mated to Alice.

"Oh, please. Shut. Up!" I begged my mind, and closed my eyes. I smirked into the darkness thinking how strangely my mind worked at times. Come morning, I would have forgotten all about it, and just put it down to having a stressful week, and that my mind was tired.

No such luck. I dreamt about them all night, and when I woke, I was hooked. I just _had_ to go and buy the books. I remembered my friend telling me she couldn't wait for the next instalment of the movies, so I knew there would be more than one book. I got up, washed and dressed, and headed to the kitchen for breakfast.

"Morning, Laura," my mom said as I sat down with some coffee and toast.

"Morning," I mumbled, my mind farther away than it should be.

"You okay?" she asked.

"Huh? Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. Just took my brain and body a lot longer than normal to shut down last night."

"You work too hard, honey. You don't need to do all the hours you do. You really don't need to do overtime. It's not like you desperately need the money," she chuckled.

"I love my job, mom. And besides, you know I want to save for our future."

She knew I was referring to Charlie and myself.

"You know I wouldn't leave you with nothing, Laura," she sighed.

"I know, mom," I sighed. I hated this discussion. She had told me often enough that she had enough money put aside to set Charlie and I up for a long time. I knew mom and dad had saved from the very moment they found out they were pregnant with me, and I knew it was a substantial amount of money.

I also knew I would use a great deal of that money to give Charlie the best education I could, if that was what he wanted. Though he had hinted often enough that as soon as he was able, he would rather get a job so he could look after me and his grandma. I had told him he would need a good education to be able to get a decent job, but he reminded me that college grades would do him fine as he wanted to be a carpenter. He said he didn't need university for that. He was extremely skilled at working with wood, and we had a few of his pieces in the house. Tables and chairs, beautifully decorated cabinets, chests of drawers, and he was currently working on an elaborate writing desk. He worked in the garage in the evenings after school, and at weekends. I was very proud of him and his work, and I knew he would have no problem setting up a business, and selling his masterpieces.

"I'm going into town, mom," I said, clearing my plate away. "Do you need anything while I'm out?"

"No, thanks. I'm good."

I nodded and kissed her goodbye, as I left for town. We didn't live far from town. About five miles, so the journey would only take ten minutes. We lived in a small village that only had a small grocery store, and not much else. I really couldn't wait to buy the Twilight books, and get back home and settle down to read them. I couldn't seem to get rid of the vampires from my mind. I really should start day dreaming more. I'm sure that's why I had become addicted to this fantasy world more than I should. It would also be the first book I've read for years. That was actually a sobering thought. It used to be so enjoyable to me to read, and I know why I stopped before, but that was no excuse for not taking it back up sooner.

I parked the car in a public car park, paid for my ticket, and walked down to the busy main street. I went into the first book store I came across. All the different genres were labelled on the shelves, and I looked through the fantasy section. Sure enough, it was there. There were four books in the saga, and there was a choice of colours and backs. Hardback, or paperback. Black jackets, or white jackets with red edging on the pages. I opted for the paperback in plain black. If I enjoyed them, I would return and buy the other sets to place on my bookshelves.

I then walked to the cash register, and the teenage sales assistant snickered slightly. No doubt she was thinking I was far too old to be reading the likes of this. I raised an eyebrow at her, and glared. The smile fell from her face and she coughed slightly. She placed my purchase in a bag, and I paid what I owed. Thanking her, though I really wanted to throttle her, I walked out the store. Across the street from the book store, was a music store, and I knew they sold DVD's, too. Shrugging, I thought, _why not? _I walked across the street, and went straight to the DVD aisle. Scanning through the various options, I saw what I needed. There were three parts to the saga on the shelves, and I assumed that the last book hadn't been adapted for film yet. That didn't matter, though. I picked up the three that was available, and paid for them, before leaving for home.

As I reached our drive, my mom was leaving.

"And where do you think you are off too?" I asked, in mock judgement.

She just laughed and said, "I'm spending the day with your aunt Bella."

My eyes shot to hers. Aunt Bella was my moms favourite little sister, but she hadn't spent any real time with her for months, even though she only stayed around the corner from us. Yes, we would visit, but no more than an hour at a time. It was a surprise to find she was going to spend the entire day with her. Another coincidence?

"Okay, mom. Will you be home for dinner?"

"Not sure, honey. You know what we're like. Once we spend the day together, we will probably end up having a drink, and I'll probably end up spending the night," she laughed.

I smiled at her. "Sure, mom. Just call me later if you decide your staying over, so I don't worry about you."

"Don't I always?" she laughed.

"No," I snickered.

"Okay, I promise I will call," she said, kissing me goodbye.

"Enjoy yourself," I said. "And tell aunt Bella I said hello, and give her a hug from me."

"Sure, honey. You're welcome to come along if you like," she said, pausing on the path, and looking back.

"No thanks, mom. I bought some new books today, so I will probably curl up on the sofa reading them while I have the peace and quiet to do so."

Her eyebrows shot up, and she smiled at me, not saying a word. She just nodded, turned and walked away. She knew I hadn't read for years, and I could see in her eyes she was pleased I was starting again. Why she was happy about it, I don't know. It's not as if I _needed_ to read now. I wasn't at school or anything, but she seemed pleased all the same. I shook my head smiling, and went into the house.

I emptied my purchases onto the coffee table, and sat and stared at them for a while. It was a strange feeling, but I was almost _scared_ to begin reading them. I didn't want to watch the movies until I had read the books because, in my opinion, the books are always better. Far more detail, and the movies tend to miss a lot out. I picked up the DVD's and placed them in my DVD rack, and sat back down and stared at the books some more. I reached over to pick up the first book, and saw my hand trembling. I snatched it back at once. What the hell was I thinking?

"Jesus, Laura," I muttered. "It's a bloody book! Get a grip! Jeez!"

I stood and stomped through to the kitchen, heading straight for the fridge, and pulled out a bottle of wine. I poured a glass and downed it in one go. Why was I feeling so nervous about reading a damn book? Was it because I was so utterly addicted to the movie after watching it last night, all the coincidences within that movie, or was it just because I hadn't read a book for so long? Yes, maybe that was it. Maybe I was scared to read again, to open my mind up for an abundance of fantasies again, when I had done so much to shut them out in the past. Coincidences were exactly that. Coincidences. It didn't mean a thing that the names in the movie meant something to me. They would probably mean something to someone in the world. I certainly wouldn't be the only one that thought that.

I walked back through to the sofa, bringing my wine with me. I refilled my glass, and reached out for the first book again. I curled my legs below me, and settled back. Taking a deep breath, I opened to the first page.


	3. Chapter 3

I couldn't put the book down. My glass of wine sat untouched on the table, and I'm sure my posture hadn't changed since I started reading. It was a good story, and it seemed to call to me on some deep, hidden level. I couldn't explain it, I just knew I had to have more. I was so engrossed in the book, that I jumped when the phone rang.

"Hi, honey," my mom drawled.

"Hey, mom," I chuckled, knowing that she and aunt Bella had already had a drink. I glanced out the window, and realised it was starting to get dark. _Twilight,_ I thought, and smiled to myself.

"Just letting you know I will be staying over with your aunt tonight. Is that okay?"

"Sure, mom. Have a great night,"

"I will honey. Will you be okay on your own?" she asked.

"Of course, mom. I've got my new books to keep me company."

"Oh, yeah. Are they any good?" she asked, and I could hear aunt Bella in the background saying "hi".

"Hey, aunt Bella. Yes, they're good mom," I laughed.

"Okay. Then I guess I'll leave you to them, and I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye mom. Have a good time."

"We will," she snickered and hung up.

I didn't realise how late it had gotten until mom called. Now was as good a time as any for a break, and to make myself some dinner. I sat the book down, and took a sip of my wine, before heading to the kitchen. I didn't have the patience for cooking, as I wanted to get back to the book, so I settled for a microwave meal. Grabbing the book and my wine, I waited in the kitchen for the microwave to ping. It didn't take long, and I sat at the kitchen table, and read while I ate.

_Wow,_ I thought to myself as I finished the first book. It was even better than the movie, and I couldn't wait to start the next one. Looking at the clock, I noticed the time. Eight thirty. I would give Charlie a quick call and head to bed to start the next one. Charlie was fine, and a little annoyed that I had interrupted his 'kill streak' as he called it. I chuckled my apologies to him, and told him to behave and have a good time, and then I headed for bed. Quickly dressing into my pyjamas, I settled into bed to start reading the second book. I was so absorbed in the book, that I hardly noticed that I was scowling and berating Edward aloud when he left Bella after her birthday. September 13th. My birthday. Another coincidence?

Like the first, I couldn't put the book down, and when I had finished the second book of the night, I glanced at the clock.

"Jesus," I whispered. Four thirty in the morning. I was going to look awful later on when mom got home, and she will worry because I hadn't slept. I needed to get a couple of hours before she returned, so I reluctantly switched my bed side lamp off, and rolled onto my side.

The few hours of sleep I caught were full of dreams. Twilight remained in my head, and it was all I dreamt about. Edward being the prominent character. When I awoke at eight thirty the same morning, I couldn't believe how obsessed I was with this work of fiction. It was like I was a child again, having a wild crush on a leading character. My imagination started running wild. _What if vampires were real? _I thought.I shook my head and went to run a bath. But, the thought lingered. I had always believed that there must be some truth behind myths and legends for there to be stories about them. _Maybe_, my ever hopeful mind thought, _just maybe, vampires and werewolves do exist. I wonder if it would even be possible for some of them to be vegetarians like the Cullen's?_

That was it. I had completely turned to the dark side. I must be insane to even consider that these almost perfect, mythical creatures in these books, could be real. I seriously needed to get a grip back on reality. I knew opening my mind up again for fantasies was not a good idea. It had been closed for so long now, that it was running amuck with the fresh fuel I had given it. That numbing thought didn't stop me from picking up the third book and taking it into the bath with me, though.

"Totally addicted," I mumbled to myself, when I lowered myself into the hot water.

Once more I became lost in the world of the supernatural, and eventually climbed out of my bath when the water was cold, and my body resembled a prune. Quickly drying myself and dressing, I headed downstairs, book still in hand, and made myself a pot of coffee and some cereal. I stayed at the kitchen table all morning engrossed in the book and my own fantasy, which was playing in my head while I read.

By the end of the weekend, I had read all four books, and couldn't wait for the following weekend so I could watch the movies. I didn't want to watch them throughout the week after work, because I wanted to give them my undivided attention, and that meant having a full day with no interruptions.

All week it was all I could think about. Daydreaming at work, and dreaming of them in my sleep. Thursday rolled around, and Suzie, (not so quietly), reminded me of our clubbing expedition on Saturday.

"Ahh, Suze. I completely forgot about it. I … I … well, I kinda promised mom and aunt Bella I would have a drink with them," I lied.

"Laura!" she almost screeched. "You promised!"

"I know, and I feel awful."

"Are you alright?" she asked, suddenly becoming anxious. "You haven't been yourself all week."

Shit. Was it that obvious?

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine, Suzie. I just …" What the hell could I tell her? That I had become obsessed with a book, and couldn't help wishing it was true? Man, she would march me straight to the nearest nut house.

"I'm sorry. I guess I have been a little off. Maybe I'm coming down with something," I mumbled.

Suzie immediately felt my brow.

"You are running a little warm," she said, removing her hand. "Okay, get yourself home and if you don't feel any better tomorrow, don't you dare think about coming into work."

I glanced into her eyes, which were now full of concern for me. I looked quickly away, afraid she would see the lie in mine.

"Okay," I agreed, but also smiling internally. I would give me the perfect excuse to play hooky from work, and curl up with my movies.

As soon as the thought entered my head, I was washed with guilt. I had never taken a day off work in my life, even when I was feeling ill. I seriously needed to stop this obsession with this story. Well, obsession was the wrong word. It wasn't strong enough for what I felt, but, at that moment, I couldn't find another that would fit.

"I really am sorry, Suze," I mumbled as I grabbed my coat.

"Yeah, well, it's a good job I love you so much then, isn't it?" she smirked.

I hugged her and said my goodbyes, and promised I would stay in bed tomorrow if I didn't feel any better. I really did feel awful about it, but what harm would one day be? None, was my internal reply. It was one day off in about eighteen years. No one would suspect that I was skipping work for a whim. Would they?

So I did take the following day off, and staying in bed, I watched the movies. I swear, I must be crazy. It felt as if I was falling in love with Edward Cullen. Most teenagers would feel the same, but I was a grown woman, for God's sake! Why did I feel such a pull toward this life of make-believe? I knew it was stupid, and berated myself often, but the thought kept sneaking back into my head, and I would find myself sighing and wishing, again, that it be true. That there was a small chance that it _could_ be true.

So, over the years, I fantasised more and more about my vampires, and found myself wishing almost every day that I could bump into one of them. Whenever I drove past an expanse of trees, I would find myself slowing and looking into them, hoping for a flash of …. _something_. Anything. I even found myself leaving my bedroom window open wide all night, and all through the year, whether I was cold or not. I know I may sound crazy, or very, very sad at the least, but I just couldn't help myself. The irresistible pull I had towards that world was unmistakeable, and I thought it would be wrong of me to ignore it. So, my secret stayed with me, and I never let on to anyone how obsessed I was. I still couldn't find the right word to fit. For four years, I lived that world in my mind, and relished it. That was until my mother became sick.

"At lease she's with grandpa now," Charlie said, as we left the graveyard. Burying my mother beside my father was what she wanted, and the grief I felt was overwhelming. I tried to smile at my son, who was trying his best to stay strong for me. I could see the despair in his eyes, and the worry that lurked there, too. He was worrying about me, as usual, and keeping his own emotions at bay to protect me.

"Yeah," I replied. "It's what she wanted, and at least they will happy they are re-united. I'm fine, honey. I will be fine, as long as you are," I said, giving him a hug.

"Mom …. Yeah, I'm ok."

I wondered what he was about to say, when he stopped himself. I let it go, as we headed back home. Maybe the day was catching up to him. Once we were home I changed out of my funeral attire, and put my pyjamas on. It was still early afternoon, but I wasn't leaving the house again today. Charlie changed into sweats and a tee, and came and sat by me on the sofa. For the first time in many years, he laid his head against my chest, and I could feel his silent sobbing.

"Shhh, honey. Everything will be alright," I whispered, as I stroked his hair. I felt him nod, and he sniffed a little. I let him be, continuing to stroke his hair, as my own silent tears fell. He was now twenty years old, but he had never felt more like a child to me, as he did now. Looking to his mother for comfort, and finding my own within him. We sat like that for over an hour. Both of our tears had dried sooner than that, but we both felt, and needed, the comfort from one and other. Eventually, he sat up again.

"Are you hungry, sweetie?" I asked, propping myself up straight, too.

"A little," he said. "You?" he asked.

"A little," I replied, a small smile at the corners of my mouth.

He returned my small smile with a small one of his own, and stood from the sofa.

"I'll make us some sandwiches and a pot of sweet tea. It won't heal us, but it will help."

"Okay," I replied.

"Why don't you look out a movie for us to watch together, while I sort us some food, mom?"

"What would you like to watch?" I asked.

"Hmm … how about those Twilight movies you have. My girlfriend says I should watch them," he said, rolling his eyes. "I don't know why she thinks a guy would be so interested in a chick flick like that, but, then again, maybe I'll learn something from them," he chuckled slightly.

His girlfriend. I hadn't met her yet, but he had only been seeing her for a few weeks, and didn't talk about her much. I didn't even know her name yet. With a chuckle of my own, I put the first DVD on. Charlie returned when the opening credits started, and sat beside me again. We both watched the film in silence, eating our sandwiches and sipping at the very hot, very sweet tea. He chuckled when the movie ended.

"Ok. I'll admit it," he said. "It was kinda good."

"And did you learn anything from it?" I asked, smiling to myself because he enjoyed it.

"Yeah, actually," he said, standing to switch of the TV. "I learned that I should never go in the woods on my own again!" he laughed.

I laughed with him, and our grief had been, not forgotten, but doused slightly, for a while at least.

"Tell me about your girlfriend. I don't even know her name yet," I asked him, not wanting to be silent with our grief again. He smiled slightly, and I knew straight away that he really liked her, whoever she was.

"She's amazing, mom. You'll love her. Her name is Renee, …." but I didn't hear the rest of his sentence. The coincidences never ceased to amaze me. Why did they seem to hit me like a bolt of lightning every time? _Get a grip!_ I snarled to myself. It's a work of fiction! But in the back of my mind, I started wishing my same old wish.

"Mom?" Charlie asked. "You okay?"

"Sorry, honey. I got lost there for a second. Please, continue."

He looked at me with a slight frown, but continued describing the new woman in his life. She sounded lovely, and I was pleased he had found someone. I was to meet her in a couple of weeks, as she had asked Charlie to invite me to dinner.

"Sounds great, honey. I can't wait to meet her," I said, with a smile, though my mind returned to my fantasy world.

A few months later, my mother's will had been sorted out, and true to her word, there was a substantial amount of money laid aside for Charlie and I. Charlie had been asking my opinion about him asking Renee to move in with him.

"Do you think it's too soon?" he asked.

Did I think it was too soon? Not really, I supposed. Jasper and I had made quick progress of our relationship, and it was a healthy one at that. Why couldn't it be the same for our son? Who could really answer that question besides him, anyway?

"No. I mean, if it's what you truly want, then I say go for it. You two are just right for one and other. I'm sure you will both be very happy. And between your business becoming successful, Renee's excellent pay at her job, and grandma's inheritance, you will both find an exquisite place to live."

"That's what I thought," he chuckled.

So, his decision was made. He would ask Renee to move in with him. What would I do then? I would be in this house on my own, that was full of memories. I decided then and there, that I would also search for a new home for myself. My dream home. One with an abundance of trees surrounding me. I could feel a shiver of excitement at the thought. My fantasies grew stronger from that moment on.


	4. Chapter 4

I was so frustrated that I hadn't found my dream home yet. Charlie and Renee had bought a sweet little cottage just outside our village, and they were now expecting their first child. I was over the moon at the thought of becoming a grandma, and that made my hunt for my dream home more important, like I had no time to spare. I wanted it badly, so that I would be able to cradle my grandchild in a rocking chair next to an open fire, and sing him, or her, lullabies. My vision was complete, though reality always came crashing down. I had almost given up hope, when, in my local newspaper, a photograph caught my attention.

That was it! The house I had been so desperately trying to find. It needed some serious renovating, but it had recently come onto the market, at a knock down price. There had been no interest in it, so the owner had to lower his asking price. And, because it was so cheap, I could afford to renovate it to my choosing. I immediately contacted the estate agent, and arranged a time and date for viewing.

It was perfect. It wasn't all that far away from Charlie. Fifteen miles. So I could visit him often and vice versa. I made an offer straight away, and straight away, it was accepted. It stood on a very large river banking, and was surrounded by thick, lush forest. It was two storeys high, and had four bedrooms. A large, country cottage kitchen, led onto the back porch through French doors, and had a fairly large garden. I would be able to plant a lovely flower garden, and also a vegetable plot. I began renovating straight away, so that the house would be ready for my granddaughter. Yes, Charlie and Renee were to be the proud parents of a daughter, and because Renee loved the Twilight movies, they had decided to call her Esme. Yeah, I know. Unbelievable.

So, at forty years old, (soon to be forty one) I finally had my dream home and my fantasies flourished in my surroundings. I was content and happy, and Charlie was happy too, and that was all that mattered. My new home had a few acres of ground with it, so I decided to quit my job and start up my own business. I decided to build stables on the grounds, and I would turn it into a livery. There were a lot of country homes around, and I thought it would be useful, as there wasn't really anywhere around here that people could stable their horses. It turned out to be a decent business opportunity. I was kept very busy, and between that, and babysitting Esme every so often, I never really had time to read my books anymore. But I didn't need to. I kept my fantasies alive in my mind, and played them out in my dreams. Yeah, I know it's pathetic, a grown middle-aged woman, having dreams of the supernatural like a teenager. But I couldn't let them go. Even if I wanted to, I knew the pull wouldn't let me. Yes, I still felt an invisible pull to the story, and it was made all the stronger by where I lived now. I still kept my bedroom window open, too.

Just as I was finishing up for the day, the office phone rang. I ran inside to answer it, but the answer machine caught it before I did. Shrugging my shoulders, I went back outside to finish up. I would listen to the message later. After dinner, and a nice warm bath, I had some spare time for myself. I didn't often get that. Tonight was one of the rare exceptions. So, I decided on a movie night. Going into the kitchen for some wine, I passed the office door and was reminded that I had a message. Grabbing a glass of wine, I headed into the office to hear the message before I settled down for the evening. There were three messages on the machine. I pressed the button to listen to them.

"_Hi. I was looking for a quote to stable my horse for two weeks," _said a sweet toned voice. _"My name is Alice. I will call back tomorrow during office hours."_

Okay, I thought. The machine beeped and moved onto the next message.

"_Hi. It's Alice again. I really do need to see you. It's time."_

What did that mean? Trust me to end up with some nutty customer. The machine beeped again, and moved onto the final message.

"_You know, you really should have answered the call instead of shrugging your shoulders and letting the machine pick up."_

How the hell? How did she know I did that? Oh, this was too creepy for me. I ran upstairs, and for the first time in years, I locked my bedroom window. The thought of some creepy stalker girl entering my home while I was asleep, was too much. She must have been watching me for her to know what I did, right? I mean, I wasn't going nuts, or I didn't misunderstand her message, did I? No it was all pretty clear. She had seen me shrugging and walking away from the phone. How else would she know? I downed my glass of wine in one, to try and steady my nerves. After a few slow breaths, I decided I was being paranoid, and went to watch my movies. But, my mind kept returning to the messages while I watched the movie.

Alice? I thought to myself. It's a pretty common name. Just another of those unexpected coincidences. But the coincidences were stacking higher than I ever predicted. Predicted? Could the Alice from my message predict what I had done? Oh, man. Get a grip! They are not real, no matter how much you want them to be. I really did need some professional help. This was getting well out of hand. I decided to make an appointment to see the doctor in the morning. I trudged up to my bed, where I had a restless night due to the wild dreams I was having.

The next morning, I was un-rested and irritable. My dreams weren't nightmares, but left me sort of drained. In them, the Cullen's had arrived to my neighbourhood, and, like the movie and books, they were all indeed vampires. Though they were not of the vegetarian persuasion. I awoke shaking, just as Edward had been about to feed from me. What was strange was, I wasn't shaking through fear, but I was shaking with anger that I had woken up. In my mind, I wanted him to bite me, to turn me. So, all morning, I was moody. If the Alice woman decided on calling me now, she would get a piece of my mind, for giving me those dreams and thoughts. Just then, the phone rang, and I nearly jumped out of my skin.

It was one of my feed suppliers, wanting this months order. I gave him it, and sighed heavily when I hung up. I was surprised at how disappointed I felt that it wasn't Alice returning her call. Stupid? Extremely. Though I couldn't help but hope. Maybe …. No that was just too insane. Or could I?

"Where's the harm?" I murmured to myself. "No one's around to hear me talk to my imaginary vampire clairvoyant."

Was I seriously considering this? Yes, seemed to be the answer.

"Okay," I whispered. "If you really do exist, and you are really who I think you are, then yes, I agree. It's time we met. Please wait until after office hours, though. If you do exist, and you do appear here, then I don't want any of my customers thinking I'm insane or ill when I faint at your presence."

Jesus. What was that? I really do need a doctor. Or a holiday at least. I'm completely mental!

The phone rang, and I steadied my breathing to answer it.

"Laura's Livery, how may I help?" I asked, though my tone was quiet.

"You won't faint you know. And yes, I will make it after hours. I can't wait to meet you Laura. See you soon."

I couldn't move. I was like a statue, with my mouth hanging open to my chest. Did I really and truly just hear that? No way! Uh uh. It couldn't be. They were real? Can't be. Couldn't be. Maybe just her? Oh man! What the hell?

I don't know how long I stood with my gaping mouth and look of complete and utter shock on my face, but it felt like hours. I needed to move, but I wasn't sure my body would allow my legs to function. I had no one else booked in for the afternoon, so I closed earlier than I ought to. There was no way I could explain to people why I looked the way I looked. I needed my brain to start working properly again, before she arrived.

"Uh … give me an hour, okay?" I said aloud, hoping she would hear me, or see me, whatever it was. Or maybe I shouldn't hope she could hear me. Maybe I'm having a mental breakdown. Yeah, that's it. I've had a lot to deal with these last few months. That was definitely it. A breakdown. I needed to relax. Take a hot bath and uncoil my mind and body. Lay off the wine though. That obviously doesn't help.

The bath made me feel better, and made me feel completely absurd about earlier. Daydreams! I was having them so frequently lately, I think my brain decided it was reality. Shaking my head, I wrapped a towel around my hair, and put my robe on. Cup of tea is what I need now, I thought. Heading into the kitchen, I flipped the switch on the kettle. I readied my cup and sat at the table while the kettle came to the boil. Just as I filled my cup, and made my way to the sitting room, the doorbell went. It startled me slightly. I didn't get many visitors, and Charlie always let himself in. I opened the door, and found a petite, dark haired, woman standing before me.

"Hi. I'm Alice. I'm not late, am I?"


End file.
